"The only blog we have to fear is blog itself."

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Quote of the Week 

"Kids are immersed and swimming for their very souls in an entertainment ocean of profanity and confusing messages from singers like [Willie] Nelson."

~~~Michael Westfall,
self-described "conservative
grassroots labor leader"

Yes, today's youth culture is all about Willie Nelson music!

(the whole piece is a gem; check it out!)

Sunday, February 26, 2006

Iraq as Underground Comic Book? 

Related to post below, I saw this scary illustration accompanying a story abut possible civil war in Iraq in the New York Times.

Sheesh, I think I'll have nightmares.

Double Take 

Sometimes you see something in a store which only strikes you as odd and funny a few minutes later. That's where Google comes in handy, to confirm that what you saw is, indeed, actually what you saw.

Like the DVD for Undercover Kitty: The Secret Agent Cat!.

This film is likely either hilariously bad or hideously cloying and saccharine. How can it not be?

Spelling with Flickr 

untitlediNature\UT as in twigIaE

Spell anything with Flickr images!


Saturday, February 25, 2006


NJ Supreme Court hears gay marriage arguments:
[Assistant NJ Attorney General Patrick] DeAlmeida argued that same-sex marriages will have a negative effect on heterosexual marriages, saying that changing the law would make a drastic change to the definition of marriage....

"If there is no harm to hetero marriage," Associate Justice LaVecchia said, "then what is the state resting this on?"

DeAlmeida responded by saying heterosexual couples will not want to marry if homosexual couples can.
WTF? And do what, live in sin?

Th*nk You Family Media Guide! 

The Family Media Guide is the "only place where parents can get detailed text descriptions on movies, video games and TV shows." It's also a great resource for learning kewl new dirty words!

According to the Guide, here's what happens in Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas:
Profanity Details

Words and Instances:
F-Word, C-word, A*s, A*shole, Balls, B*stard, B*tch, Christ, C*ck, Crap, C*m, Damn, D*ck, God Damn, Hell, Jesus, N*gger, Piss, Pr*ck, P*ssy, Screw, Sh*t, Tw*t

Profanity Examples in context:
"F*ck you." - "You a*s." - "Hey a*shole." - "Hey, b*stard." - "Crazy b*tch." - "That's bullsh*t" - "Christ, you never do anything right" - "You c*ck" - "Forget that crap" - "I'm going to c*m." - "You c*nt." - "Damn you." - "Sucking one d*ck." - "God Damn it." - "What the hell?" - "Jesus man, what are you doing?" - "Hey n*gger." - "I've had to piss all day." - "You pr*ck." - "Ballers are p*ssies." - "Screw you man." - "I'm down with this sh*t." - "You tw*t."

Sex Details

Sexual Content Overview:
Sexual intercourse implied by sounds and motion with no nudity. Depictions of prostitution. Erotic dancing with females wearing g-strings and pasties. Scene contains depictions of sex equipment. Sexual innuendos and phrases, including the words “a*s,” “c*m,” “tits,” and “wanking.”

Sexual Examples in context:
A man picks up a prostitute and they drive into a dark alley and park; the car rocks back and forth and we hear the woman moan. Women wearing only a g-string and pasties dance erotically in a strip club. A man enters a woman’s house and sees a leather “gimp suit” hanging on the wall. He enters her bathroom and discovers a sex toy in the shower. "I like fast a*s, not slow." - "I'm c*mming!" - "Wanking off on some fat girls tits."
Thanks, Family Media Guide!

Especially for your bizarre asterisk policy, in which you can only bring yourself to write "F-word" until you put it in context as "F*ck you." Yet you leave one of the seven dirty words, "tits," with its shame uncovered. You know, as in the phrase, "Wanking off on some fat girls tits."

You rock, Family Media Guide!

On a side note, I'm disappointed that they didn't enshrine my favorite Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas line of all, so I'll do it here: "I don't give a shit, 'cuz I'm gangsta!" (spoken by OG Loc [Jas Anderson])

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Cheney's shot heard 'round the world... 

...recreated in Lego.

Oh, no you di'n't! 

2 e-mailers get testy, and hundreds read every word:
That's when the exchange, confirmed as authentic yesterday by Korman and Abdala, began whipping through cyberspace, landing in e-mail in-boxes around the city and country, and, eventually, across the Atlantic.

In short order, it has become yet another cautionary tale that you should definitely not put in an e-mail anything you wouldn't want the rest of the world to read.
Is there really much a market for "trust fund baby" criminal defense lawyers who want to establish "somewhat of a career"?

Full text of the email exchange here.

Monday, February 20, 2006


From the Barneys New York website:
Barneys stands for taste, luxury and humor.
Humor? Does the purple Barney work there now?

Sunday, February 19, 2006

Perfect 10? 

Scientists are looking for hotties, ones of the right age and size. And ones that aren't too gassy...

"We want to see [them] with our own eyes," says one. "The truth is...it is hard to really rank them."


Saturday, February 18, 2006

"What Would Jesus Blog?" 

The big guy's own corner of the blogsophere. I especially enjoyed his best and most disappointing albums of 2005.

Wow! Sitting here reading his blog, he almost seems not fictional!

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Countdown: 1102 days to go until my TVs are obsolete 

Digital Date of 2009 Signed Into Law:
After Feb. 17, 2009 all TV broadcasts are to be in digital, a format that promises higher picture definition, more programming streams and efficient use of scarce spectrum.

Challenges remain, since roughly one in five households relies on over-the-air reception and would need new digital equipment to keep watching TV. The cable and satellite customers who comprise the majority of TV viewers should experience little disruption as system operators translate signals for their traditional analog equipment.
Speaking as someone without cable or satellite service--and no plans to get either--this is lousy. I guess I hope The Simpsons is cancelled by then, and then I can just chuck the whole TV concept into the garbage. Buh-bye!

Friday, February 10, 2006

What Becomes an Over-Used Phrase Most 

MR. McCLELLAN: This is international communications that are being monitored --
Q But whatever -- it's David's point, too -- I mean, whatever you call it --
MR. McCLELLAN: It's what it is.
Q -- is being spied on. Someone's communications --
MR. McCLELLAN: It is what it is.
Q -- on domestic soil are being tracked.

"How are you guys responding to all the hub bub over what happened the other day with Sean Preston?" Tony asked the party-going couple. "It is what it is, it's the press. I mean, there is nothing new with them, with me," Britney [Spears] told Access [Hollywood].

"You all ask us to tell you something, and when we kind of skate around the truth, that's accepted," [Jerome] Bettis said. "But when we tell you what we believe to be the truth, I think we've been criticized. So, it's a shame that he spoke out on what he believes and he's being criticized. But, it is what it is. He understands that. He's going to accept that burden of responsibility."

Winners, on the other hand, can use their allotted 45 seconds of acceptance time to say anything they like. "They earned it," he says. Even if it turns out to be - gasp - political. "I can't control it," [Gil] Cates says. "I have nothing to do with it." Besides, by the time the curtain goes up on the live Oscar broadcast, Cates' job is basically done. "It's a one-take show," he says. "It is what it is."

Yeah, exactly. I mean, I’m a real humble dude, but I have to say it because it is what it is. He had artists like Kool G. Rap, Big Daddy Kane, MC Shan, Roxanne Shante, Biz Markie… all under one unit and one flag, you know what I’m sayin’. I mean, I don’t think it was even ever done before that to have artists of that caliber. These artists under the Juice Crew were legends in their own way, ya know? I’m a legend for what I did… for what I did for the game. Big Daddy Kane, I mean, you still hear this guy’s name to this day.

Most of his employees were part-timers or students, but his plans as of Monday were to collect unemployment until he could find a new job. "It's unfortunate we have to lose our jobs, but it is what it is I guess," he said.

Should a intimate relationship between two members of the same sex even be an issue in this day and age? "Well it is what it is, for the material and society," [Ang] Lee said. "And because it is still an issue, that makes the material all the more interesting to me, because all great love stories have great obstacles -- and that's what the story builds on. In life, I wish it wouldn't be an issue."

"I loved Enron. I loved that company. I built that company," [Jeffrey Skilling] said. "Most of my acquaintances, most of the people I knew, were with the company. So yeah, it's been hard. But again, it is what it is. That's the environment we have to deal with."

F**k how old I am, f**k everything else, like I said the other day, there’s a whole bunch of n***as in the game that are in the 35 to 40 year old realm that are running Hip-Hop. That’s the age. It is what it is. Guess what? I can still f**king f**k with a 21-year-old real n***a and f**king be shoulder to shoulder with him. That’s what the difference is.

"People see what I did: walk off the court. I snatched my back brace off and threw it. I'm frustrated. We're losing. I'm frustrated," [Kenyon] Martin said. "Whatever it is, people are going to assume. ... It is what it is."

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Love, Bureaucratic Style 

The Army's Marching Orders on Marriage: Jerks, No; Acronyms, Yes:
They are the Pentagon's new "rules of engagement": U.S. Army chaplains are trying to teach troops how to pick the right spouse, through a program called "How to Avoid Marrying a Jerk."


The program is also called "PICK a Partner," for Premarital Interpersonal Choices and Knowledge.

It advises the marriage-bound to study a partner's FACES -- family background, attitudes, compatibility, experiences in previous relationships and skills they would bring to the union. It teaches the them to pace themselves with a RAM chart -- the Relationship Attachment Model, which basically says not to let your sexual involvement exceed your level of commitment or level of knowledge about the other person.
Makes you wonder if these chaplains conclude their wedding ceremony with a simple "Target Acquired."

Sunday, February 05, 2006

"One for the Thumb" 

For 25 years in this town of Pittsburgh, football fans have been screaming "one for the thumb!" as a rallying cry--seeking the elusive 5th Superbowl ring. I've only been here for three years, but it's enough to be caught up in the enthusiasm.

Stepping out onto my front porch after Steeler touchdowns, it was amazing to hear the dull roar of muffling cheering leaking out from houses up and down my neighborhood--while, at the same time, street traffic was next to nil.

I went out for a walk after Pittsburgh cinched it--Terrible Towel in hand--and joined in with the ad hoc black parties springing up at major intersections. We pedestrians waved our Towels at cars, they wave 'em back and honk their horns, and we shout and yell in response. During my brief travels, I got a free beer, high-fived a lot of strangers, and saw a flaming couch in the street.

Now that Ben Roethlisberger has become the youngest QB to win the Superbowl, I suspect that Ben Ben's Beef Jerky (original and teriyaki) will go national. T-shirts commemorating "The Tackle" will probably stay localized.

So, tomorrow, all the schools in town are opening 2 hours late. I guess even the kids will be hung over.

And now football fans in town need a new rallying cry.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Treats for the Superbowl 

Leading up to the Superbowl this Sunday from 4-6pm ET, I'll be hosting a musical celebration of football and the Steelers on WYEP.

Avoiding most of the cliché song selections (okay, okay... I can't resist "Song #2" from Blur), you'll hear music from Sly & The Family Stone to Gomez, from Todd Rundgren to Tricky, from The Who to The Kaiser Chiefs.

There are shockingly few songs specifically football-themed (especially compared with songs about baseball) but you'll hear some of the best and most obscure of these: Mel & Tim's 1969 R&B gem "Backfield in Motion," "All Kinds of Time" by Fountains of Wayne, the Meat Puppets' "Touchdown King," "Football Fuge" by Pete Townshend (okay, technically about soccer, but it still works).

And in case you're wondering--no, I will not be on the air live. It's pre-taped so I don't have to miss kick-off.

So feel free to use this as the soundtrack to your Superbowl party pre-game festivities. Unless you're a Seahawks fan. Then bugger off.

I won't be playing any of the numerous homebrew Steeler fight songs that are all over the place here, but here's a classic of that category for your listening pleasure: "Steel It Steelers!" ~~Freddie Waters, 1979

Go Steelers!

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