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"The only blog we have to fear is blog itself."

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Dear Jonas Brothers 

Or, more specifically, to the attorneys of the Jonas Brothers:

I happened to follow a link which resulted in me ending up on your official website, and realized that I hadn't read your site's Terms of Service. Normally, you understand, I am very diligent and be sure that I am in compliance with any random site's TOS before reading any of the content therein, but I have been a little under the weather with a cold.

Anyway, my legal team and I were combing through your TOS so I could continue browsing your totally awesome website, and we hit a few sticking points. According to section 8(p), in order to use the site, I must "agree not to......intentionally or unintentionally violate any...regulations promulgated by the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission, any rules of any national or other securities exchange, including, without limitation, the New York Stock Exchange, the American Stock Exchange or the NASDAQ, and any regulations having the force of law."

See, I have a stock pump-and-dump operation in the works and was planning on violating several SEC regulations, but this has very little to do with my interest in finding out the Jonas Brothers' next tour date, right? So can we strike this section?

Also, in Section 8(r), you take pains to restrict Jonas Brothers fans from teaching each other to "assemble bombs, grenades and other weapons." Just what sort of rabble are you expecting to swell the ranks of Jonas Brothers fans?

Sincerely,
Mike's Minutiae
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Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Sing along! 

Here's the story of a lovely lady
Who was bringing up five very lovely kids
All of them eat their mooseburgers
And one of them's knocked up.

Here's the story of a man named McCain
Who was busy with a bimbo of his own
They had twelve houses staffed with servants
Yet they were all alone.

Till the one day when the lady met this fellow
And they knew it was much more than a hunch
That this group would somehow form a family
That's the way they all became the Campaign Bunch
The Campaign Bunch

That's the way they all became the Campaign Bunch
The Campaign Bunch!

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